Frank & Candid Divorce Info

Question: What is Mental Cruelty?

Answer: Mental Cruelty is one of Illinois' twelve grounds for divorce. This ground came into existence in the early 1970's.

During the first ten years or so of Mental Cruelty's existence as a ground for divorce in Illinois, the courts required greater proof of mental cruelty than that which is required today.

Virtually all proof of grounds for divorce is presented to the court by way of testimony by the aggrieved party. During the aforesaid earlier period of Mental Cruelty in Illinois, it was necessary to prove, at least, the following to the court:

1. That the wrongdoer spouse embarked upon an intentional pattern of conduct over a prolonged period of time which was intended for the sole purpose of damaging and/or eroding the mental health of the victim spouse. (It was not enough that the wrongdoer spouse was merely annoying or unintentionally difficult to live with. He or she must have committed specific acts which were intended to injure the other party's mental state). One act was not enough. It had to have been extreme and repeated intentional behavior.
2. The victim spouse was required to prove to the court that he or she was, indeed, emotionally or mentally damaged and must have sought and received treatment from the medical community (family physicians, psychiatrists, psychologists) for treatment to the symptoms of the damages caused to that person.
3. The symptoms of such mental or emotional suffering had to be explained to the court (loss of weight, sleep, appetite, etc.)
4. Generally, testimony was introduced as to what type of medication was prescribed to remedy the symptoms complained of and then testimony would then be offered regarding how said symptoms disappeared or became greatly reduced once the parties separated.

Then and now, the aggrieved party must show that he or she gave the wrongdoer spouse no cause or provocation for the latter's behavior.

Today, testimony regarding medical and/or prescriptive treatment is not needed nor does the court require stringent proof that the wrongdoer's behavior was, indeed, as extreme as was required earlier. By way of example, and jokingly. I have often stated that, in the old days, you almost had to prove that he or she threw a rat in the other's soup on a regular basis in order to inflict emotional pain. Today, it might be enough to show that the the wrongdoer becomes argumentative and unreasonably loud and insulting on a regular basis, if the soup is served a little late.

Testimony is still offered regarding the fact that the other party's behavior caused emotional distress and that same has become alleviated by virtue of the separation or because of the peaceful attitude that was established once the parties' case made a definite turn toward settlement or other resolution. We need to still show the court that the acts were ongoing and with utter disregard for the possible pain inflicted on the victim spouse. Some good examples of that behavior are:

1. Starting a lot of unnecessary arguments in the house;
2. Yelling, screaming, or often displaying rage in the household;
3. Accusing the victim spouse of being worthless or otherwise minimizing his or her importance in the household;
4. Constantly criticizing the victim spouse's abilities as a homemaker, breadwinner, parent, spouse;
5. Coming and going from the household at odd hours without explaining his or her whereabouts;
6. Refusal or inability to communicate in a reasonable fashion with the innocent spouse and refusal to see that as a problem.

Generally, it is explained to the court that the victim spouse has confronted the other spouse in a positive and constructive fashion and has asked the wrongdoer spouse to attempt to seek counseling or otherwise correct his or her behavior and that these requests were refused by word or by deed.

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